...Poem #2 [DISCLAIMER: I like to write using metaphors for things more meaningful] - 6/26

I love the way you snatch me out of my place of resting and excite me...grabbing me firmly and not letting go until you get what you want out of me.  Sometimes I feel like you're using me but I'm usually down for doing whatever you wanna do.  You slap my backside to punish me for not doing what I'm told - for running away and trying to escape your hold - for not submitting myself to you.  You try to force all of yourself on me or in me and although the thought of you controlling me is pleasing...I can't help but fear.  There is a satisfying pain in the strength that you have but what happens if I continue to make you mad? Will you strike me?  I mean it's rough nightly but sometimes I just want you to love me more politely.  But what would it then feel like - would that be real life?  I don't think so...You can't change without friction and so this painful affliction I endure with you...I'm more than happy to.  Because...you're helping me grow and one day I can hopefully show you that I like it rough - and I don't mind an occasional hard tap or grab - I'll take all of you in and in doing so be glad.

June 26th - Poem #1

I feel like I'm procrastinating when it comes to my progression.  The assignment that God has dealt me is just something I don't wanna turn in and I'm contemplating failing life's lessons.  It's crazy cuz it's not that I lack the knowledge or ability to get things done - it's just that my mind is encamped by my negligent wants to have fun- to turn up some - to let loose for a night but...it's never just one.  I'm gifted but I'm tempted by the pleasant taste of emptiness.  Not feeling too full to me is better than to be fed because when I'm fed there's no more reason for me to want things so I'm prolonging the process and pushing back my purpose while trying to persuade people to continually progress.  I'm a hypocrite.  Blocking myself from my betterment and the only interfering element is me.  I'm destined to succeed but right now successful is not a place I wanna be.  But the day is coming and it will only begin by me deciding to live out the life that God has already signed, sealed, and delivered to me through my writing.